We can all agree the concept of virginity is waaaaaay overblown in today’s society.

Girls (and guys!) that choose to wait or just haven’t had their first time yet have to deal with their fair share of stupid assumptions and judgements too, especially once you pass a certain age.

So when someone tells you they’re a virgin, please, please, please don’t respond with any of the following.

1. How are you still a virgin? Still a virgin? Is there a specific age in which you are meant to lose your virginity that I didn’t know about? I’m not still a virgin. I just am one. There’s no reason to rush or give myself a deadline for losing my virginity.

2. It’s no big deal. Maybe for your first time, you met the right person at the right time and all the pieces fell into place and it was no big deal, but that hasn’t happened for me. I’m still waiting for my moment, and that’s okay. 

3. Just get it over with. I don’t want to “just get it over with”. I want it to be special, at the right time, with the right person. How about you just get over me being a virgin?

4. Sex is so fun, though. That’s what I’ve heard. I’ve also heard jumping out of an airplane is fun. That doesn’t mean I’m going to jump out of any old plane. I’d rather wait until I save up my money to afford the highest rated skydiving service with the best, most fail-safe parachutes in the biz so that I don’t plummet to my death. I hold the first person I have sex with to the same standard, basically.

5. You’re missing out. Missing out on sex with the wrong person at the wrong time? I’m okay with that.

6. You’re giving sex too much importance. Sex doesn’t have to mean the same thing to everyone. To me, the who, when, and where is really important. I know myself, and chances are, if I just “got it over with” and pretended it was “no big deal”, I’d probably feel really crappy after because that’s not what’s right for me.